Sarah Eldred – Beyond Fertility

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At the age of 43 and after three miscarriages at 5, 11 and 12 weeks respectively, I came across Dr Deepika’s clinic through a website search.

Having tried traditional chinese medicine and, for personal reasons, decided not to go down the IVF route, I wanted to see if Ayurvedic medicine could do something to help me have a baby.

Dr Deepika Rodrigo qualified in Ayurvedic medicine in Sri Lanka and is an Ayurvedic doctor. She has a very warm and friendly manner, in fact all the staff do – Ajanta, Sachi and Khema.

While encouraging me to be hopeful about a positive outcome, it was refreshing to attend a clinic where they were open that things might not happen.

The main focus of the treatment is face-to-face appointments with Deepika (or via Skype if you prefer). Miscarriage is not something many people talk about. Here you can talk about it. In fact Dr Deepika has experienced this herself. You are prescribed herbs, which for me were meant to reduce the heat in my body, and I was given a diet sheet to guide you on what foods to eat and to avoid, according to Ayurvedic principles.

While I can’t say I like the taste of all the herbs you are prescribed, the Panchakarma fertility treatment is an amazing experience. This can help to cleanse you and also deal with any emotional issues which you might have buried and have not wanted to face.

For me, I’m someone who is maternal, but like many others found love late in life. I always knew that getting pregnant might not be plain sailing. After experiencing a series of traumatic miscarriages, the questions I was grappling with were – can you be a complete woman without having children? How much pain and suffering am I prepared to put myself and my partner through to have a baby? Am I putting undue pressure on myself due to anxiety about what family/friends/society expects of me?

Two things struck me about my valuable discussions with Dr Deepika. What stops me from being a mother to the whole universe, instead of just one child? Nothing. Do I have a divine right to have a baby? No.

I don’t know what it was. Whether it was the talking, the herbs, the Panchakarma or a combination of all three – but I experienced a real shift in my thinking and emotions. It was acceptance.  I can only describe it as liberating – I let go of hurt, desire and jealousy.

Now, I’m one of the 30% of clients who for whatever reason hasn’t fallen pregnant on Dr Deepika’s programme. Some would say this is failure. But I wouldn’t. Yes, I don’t have a baby, but deep down I feel I have in fact gained so much more. So what has changed?

As a result I am a happier, more contented individual who is grateful for what she does have. I no longer cry when I see someone else pregnant or with a young baby and I don’t have to leave the room when my sister-in-law and her friends talk about their babies and forthcoming births, My concern now is more with the mother and baby, rather than what I am missing out on. Essentially I am less selfish, I’m no longer the victim, the universe doesn’t owe me anything and there are many people worse off than me. I have recently got engaged to my loving and supportive partner who loves me for me, with or without a baby, and I am embarking on my dream career to train as a yoga teacher.

For everyone going to see Dr Deepika and her team, I do hope you are successful, but if it doesn’t happen as it didn’t for me know you are not alone – and it’s okay. Life doesn’t stop. One could argue in fact it opens you up to new beginnings.

I hope reading this may have helped someone.

Sarah – a happy 43-year old woman, excited about what life has to offer now and in the future.